View from the hole....

This is an excerpt from today's lesson that I studied.  Thought I would share it with each of you.


Day 27

Defeating Temptation
Reveal your struggle to a godly friend or support group.

As I have had a moment here and there in the past week or so - I have noticed that each of us seems to be in a different area of struggle.  Today's lesson couldn't be more timely.  If you look back over our studies, I think you will see how He has time and again showed up so very large on our behalf to give us all we need to be over comers.

I have been so very guilty of crawling into that hole I always go to and pulling the dirt over me in an attempt to cope.  That certainly has never worked in the past and and sure didn't work any better this time around either.

I find it oh so amusing how God will take those times when I am being so dense and just knock me up side the head with His divine wisdom yet one more time.  I can just hear Him saying, "Well DUH".  Ha ha ha.   Really, you think I would be a bit more on top of it by now wouldn't you?  But alas, no.  It seems I am rather fond of knocking my head up against a wall.  

Might account for my being rather "special" don't ya think?  Hey, don't be afraid to snicker as I am enjoying a laugh at myself as well.

Ecclesiastes 4:  9Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor:
10If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.

There are those times when we need to open ourselves up and confess our temptations to another in order to break the vicious cycle of intention/failure/guilt.  Remember dear friends, none of us is without guilt and no one sin is greater than another ( however much we might like to convince ourselves otherwise ).  God has given us relationships so that we might have that partner to pray with us, pray for us, encourage us, and most of all to hold us accountable so that we might defeat the temptation!

I really enjoyed the perspective gained by the wording Rick Warren chose for this statement.  ** Authentic honest fellowship is the antidote to your lonely struggle against those sins that won't budge.** RW   Beautifully said.

James 5:16  New Living Translation (©2007)
Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.

TAA DOWWWW... Yeah baby!!  Power punch right there!!!  Reinforcing once more that truth abides in the light and defeats all sin!

View from the hole:  ( you know, the one I created and referenced above )
View?  What view?  The "view" sucks!  The hole is dark, dank, and stinks on multiple levels.  The aloneness only intensifies the hurt making it seem larger than life and un-defeat able.  The hurts grow until they over whelm you and push you into a position from which you can no longer begin to see the light.  This hole is made deeper by the information age where the only picture others see is the one you paint for them.  Since there is very little personal interaction - one can paint quite the merry little scene in spite of the dark hole in which you reside.  Who would want to stay here?  You would be surprised.  The hole is familiar.  The hole is relatively safe from further hurt.  Do you see the twisted logic that happens when in the hole?  Grab your shovel, hitch up your britches, put your boots in motion and walk into freedom.  RW said it best - "You are only as sick as your secrets".

We don't want to admit our faults out of pride.  So we paint pretty little pictures on fb of a life full of smiles and laughter.  We walk the halls of our church and we continue with the mask firmly in place.  I am fine, how are you?  Isn't it great?  So very NOT.

Guess what folks?  Life is hard!  We get dirty!  There are messes!  So what?  So do you, and you, and you.  It is high time we realize we are in the mud together and work to haul each other out!!  There is zero fun in the mire and the Father is waiting to wash us clean and seat us at the banquet table so that we may feast with Him.

I do believe I will delete "I am fine" from my conversations.  If you ask me how things are, you had best be ready for the answers because the game of pretend is only good for young children and fools.  I am neither.

So grab on to my hand, let's walk ourselves outta here and get to living life together!!

Love you all so much.

katrina

You can't fake fresh....

I read this just recently in regards to those of us who raise chickens and enjoy the benefits of fresh eggs each day.

Then God took such a seemingly innocent remark and turned it back to me.  You can't fake fresh.

Huh??

Then over a cup of coffee and a morning study, I got it!  You can't fake fresh!  You cannot fake a fresh relationship with Christ.  If you are daily living in His presence and walking in His calling, your relationship with Him will be fresh!  Wow.... Sometimes the simple can trip me up faster than the profound.  Causes me to giggle at myself every time.

Seems to me that it is way to easy to get caught up in what we like to term as "living" and we forget our first love.  In so doing, we trade the truth for a lie.  You see, the hustle and bustle, all the demands on our time, the "to do" lists, are not living.  It is the lie known as busyness.

I am too busy to read my Bible.  I am too busy to pray.  I am too busy to attend church.  I am too busy to love others.  Busyness is easily the greatest slimy sneaky tool the enemy ever enacted to steal us away from our love.  Busyness creeps in a bit at a time.  Busyness robs from God, from our family, takes our joy, steals our peace.  What are we left with?  Oh yeah.... busyness.

Our first love.  God.  Our Father.  He gives all that busyness steals.  He provides the means to have family in the fullest sense of the word.  He provides a joy that is based upon our relationship with Him rather than a fleeting moment.  God grants us a peace that no tragedy or sorrow can steal.  God gives us pure love which knows no boundaries.

So the statement remains.  You can't fake fresh.

And I choose not to!!  I choose to point these boots on the road He has placed me on, pull my chair up to the table and talk with him every morning, place my hat on my head and smile as I revel in all that the Savior brings me.

For God will not take me where He cannot sustain me!!

Come on, join me.  Get those boots a walkin.....

katrina

Don't get up to fast....

It happens oh so fast.  One minute you are standing firm and the next you are face down in the dirt.  Quickly we jump up, glance around at who might have seen our fall, and then begin to brush ourselves off.

With the sun streaming down this beautiful morning, God has brought more light in to my life.  Light which brings knowledge.  Knowledge which brings yet another crossroad.  The choice to follow or to turn on to my own path.  Should I choose to apply this knowledge to my life, then there I will find peace, contentment, unbridled joy.

What could such a revelation have been?  Perhaps nothing that would be earth shattering for you.  Perhaps something you have already learned and known.  For me, it was just yet another revelation of Himself and how much He loves me.

Today's lesson is: do not rush to get up when I fall.  Couldn't have shocked me more.  Why on earth would I not want to immediately rush to my feet and get back on the path He is leading me on?  The answer is so simple when you think about it.

I fell.  There was and is always a cause for the fall.  Most often, the cause lies within me; sometimes deeply hidden and sometimes quite flagrant.  The reason is the great I.  No, no, no.... pay close attention.  Not the great I Am, the King Eternal - but the great I.  Or at least great to me.  I, of course, am referring to myself.  The I.  The Me.  The one who wants to have it be all about her.....me, me, me.

The simple truth is, when my eyes and my heart are focused firmly on my God, my position in Him is secure and firm and there is no stumbling and no fall.  When I place my eyes on myself, my wants, my wishes, my desires, the fall comes up faster than the speed of light.

As painful as all of this was to admit, the worse was yet to come.  There was stil the issue of the "why" of the fall.  Here is where God called me to search myself.  Instead of rushing to my feet, being concerned with any embarrassment I might have suffered, or brushing myself off in a hustle to get back on the path, I need stay.

kw:   Stay Lord?  Are you sure?  You want me to stay face down in the dirt?

OMEGA:  Stay my child.

kw:  Why would you want me to stay?  Do I need to learn humility through embarrassment?  Do I need to learn patience through suffering? Why Lord?  ( geesh calling me child was sure right on the mark on His part )

OMEGA:  Stay my child and take that moment to worship your God for protecting you during your fall.  Then come to just your knees and turn your heart and ears fully to Me.  Listen as I reveal the cause of your fall.  Take the time to repent the cause and allow Me to instruct you and grow you so that you do not fall again to such.

Silence....because there is only weeping from me.  Silence....because I am indeed such a foolish child.  Always inclined to rush.  But my Father is one of great patience who loves me fully.  With a hand full of love, He draws me to Him and comforts me.  He shows me a portion of His plans for me.  He brushes away my tears and assures me that His love will always win over my foolishness.

What an awesome and amazing God I serve.  So yes.... I will lay with my face in the dirt, thankful for the great Jehovah Jireh that always provides for me.

It is always my prayer that by sharing a bit of my heart with you my friends, that you will be touched to seek the face of God who longs to show you all the love He has for you.

katrina.....

Seasons ......

Each of our lives can easily be marked by a metaphor.  For my much loved aunt, her metaphor is "cheer leader".  She has a beautiful gift of encouragement.  She is an encourager by nature and has allowed God to develop that gift even further in her life and she blesses all those she is around with it in abundance. 

My life's metaphor is "the seasons of nature".  

You see, being a country girl, I am well familiar with the ebb and flow of the seasons.  More importantly, when I contemplate the seasons and how each season works to bring to perfect fruition all growth processes, I can then begin to truly appreciate all the growing seasons in my spiritual life.

Spring is a time of new birth.  The temperatures begin warming, the grounds are watered with rain, and those things that have been planted come "springing" forth.  That new beginning is marked by our acceptance of Christ as Savior and Lord of our lives.

Summer heralds the arrival of rapid growth and warm temperatures.  These are marked by long days filled with sun, plants stretching to the heavens, producing large amounts of fruit, and a time of lushness.  This rapid growth is our maturing process as Christians.  We begin to experience relationships, discover love, and establish ourselves in a church family.

Fall is a time of gathering the harvest.  Maturity is a reality at this time and the fruits of such can be gathered by all those around.  Love has been learned and is freely shared, acts of service are a natural response, and we begin to share our learning and experiences with others.

Winter is a time of rest and dormancy.  Winter does not necessarily represent death although it can.  Winter is that time in which things are quiet and still.  That time in which we are moving neither backward nor forward.  Winter is that time when we become dormant.  We can often experience winter after times of loss or hurt.  Winter can be a healer in that the time of dormancy and is spent in restoration, preparing us to move forward into spring once more.

You see the seasons are not a single occurrence in my spiritual journey but rather a repeating process that God uses to keep me active and growing in my relationship with Him.  After all, that is the very foundation of my walk.... RELATIONSHIP.  

Early mornings......and dirt

I have been an early riser all my life......  As soon as there is light, my body is awake and ready to move.  Can't really tell you if this is due to a predisposition of physical make up or if this is simply in an born reaction to the life of a country girl.

What I can say, is that there is nothing in the world like the silence of the mornings when people are not yet stirring.  I wander outside and listen to nature which is already in the midst of it's own awakening.  I mean honestly, have you ever made it awake and out before your rooster does?  Odds are not likely.

As I walk around our property, I enjoy the chickens as they scurry out from the safety of their coop and hurry to be the first to take the treats I am scattering.  The goats are calling me to hurry and come spend time with them, preferably their morning ration in hand.  The lgd's are scampering around begging for a pet as well as checking on all the critters with me.  A stray - well really, can Bull even be called a stray any longer? - waits in the barn for breakfast.  The rest of the dogs are all arguing over who gets out for play time first.

Yet even amongst the murmurings of the animals, there is such peace that just floods over me.  A calmness that this is where I was created to be.  During my life I have lived in many different situations and circumstances.  I have walked many roads.  Some of these roads where smooth and marked by love and some, well, they were more of a rocky crevice than a road and brought along their fair share of pain and hurt.  Trailer parks, country homes, military bases, subdivisions, apartments, trailers:  I have known them all.

I have been; the scruffy country girl climbing on hay bales and sitting on fences watching horses, the urban girl always stylish and enjoying the finer things, the military brat / military / and military wife, the mom in the suburbs making the rounds of soccer games, the AQHA rider / 3 day eventer / dressage queen / endurance rider / and trail riding guru, yet all these times - all these circumstances the ones that stand out the most and brought the most contentment were those marked by dirt.

You see, I am well and truly a country girl.  Always have been, always will be.  It is where my heart longs to be and my body finds satisfaction.  I am a woman like others in that I enjoy things that sparkle ( could very well be the silver on my bridle ), I like dinner and wine, I like to dress up upon occasion, and love to catch the eye of my man.  Nothing appeals to me more than a shadowed jaw, his hands rough from work, sweating together working under the rays of the sun, and knowing that his eyes are looking at mine from under his hat brim.

You may see me in town sometime, dirt on my jeans, dust on my face, hands rough, hay in my hair, face shining with sweat, but you know what?  That is okay.  I have learned that those things that radiate beauty are those things that reflect the Creator God.  I have learned to appreciate and value that God has made me to be uniquely me.  He loves me completely the way I am.  The best gift I can give to the One who loves me so, is to surrender all that I am to Him and reflect Him in all that I do.

So I will treasure the dirt, the grass, the hay, the dust that seems to always follow me.  I will put in an honest days work, follow Christ with all my heart, and seek His pleasure above all others.

Perhaps it is time that we as a nation and a unique people remember the basics of what is truly important in life.  It is so simple.  God, family, friends.  Anything else is a blessing from the hand of the Almighty.

I pray that today finds your hands a bit dirty, sweat on your brow from honest work, your feet on a country path, and that your heart is full of the Father.

Boot prints and prayers to you all.....

Reflections of Love

Have you ever stood on the banks of a creek, river, stream, or lake? Just standing there glancing at the beauty of the water and taking in the peace that comes with such beauty. As you stand there, you begin to notice all that is reflected on the surface of the water. Sunlight shimmering gold, rocks/cliffs muted and soft, trees come alive in the movement on the water. So many reflections - all unseen by the crowds but noticed and treasured by the one standing there. So is love. Love is whispered each minute of each day. Love is not the shout that screams for attention. Love is not grand gestures amongst a crowd. Love cannot be bought. Love cannot be forced. Love is the humble, the meek. Love is a choice lived daily marked by self sacrifice and a heart broken before God.

2013 Speak to me...... or not

January 8th 2013..... the "new year" is officially under way.

Each year as the final days of December approaches, a myriad of thoughts, vows,  and actions can be found within each and every person.  For some, it is a time to review the previous year and set goals for the year ahead.  For others, it is more of a sigh that they survived the happenings of the year and are hopeful that the next will be a kinder, gentler year.  Still others find themselves vowing to do more, be better, achieve the dream.

It is often rather amusing to watch attendance at the local gym... during the Thanksgiving / Christmas days and weeks there is almost no one in attendance.  Openings are plenteous and machines sit quietly waiting oh so patiently.  Then lo and behold.... January 1st arrives.  The same gym, same staff, same machines are now fraught with activity - it is shoulder to shoulder and the activity level is at an all time high.

In walks January 8th....  Once more the opportunities are plenteous and the machines sit quietly.  Vows of a "new" year already start to wan.  Why is that???

And then it becomes all so clear.  One simple sentence....

***** Finding the One that has been there all along ******

What we seek is nothing that has not been sought before.  What our heart cries out for echoes the cries of a multitude across generations of peoples.  Our deepest longings can be heard in the whispers contained in the hearts of Adam and Eve as they left the Garden.

Alpha / Omega ... the beginning and the end.  The answer to all our questions, the direction we seek, the love we desire....  our all in all.

Myself being no different than any of you, have found my thoughts wandering over the last days as to what should, would, or could become of 2013.  Thoughts of a home of our own, renewed health, family proximity and more circled my mind stealing the minutes of the day away.  I found myself once again being held captive to the bondage of looking at the "what ifs".  What if I pray more?  What if I study more?  What if I eat healthy?  What if I exercise? What if, what if, what if....

No more - no more I say!  A reactionary life based on what if's is a life that is not being lived.  Circumstances, events, and happenings will change bringing along the tide that will carry you to places unseen and often, unwanted.

Finding the One that has been there all along - then grabbing on and not letting go for so much as a second.  In so doing we are now freed from the tides of what if's and circumstances.  We are freed to redeem each minute before us and fill that one minute with His love; then the next minute, the one after that, and the one that comes after that.  Here you are at days end with a compliment of minutes behind you over flowing with love and as you lay your head down to rest, your eyelids flutter shut, the Holy Spirit whispers across your soul "Well done thou good and faithful servant".  Peace,  Joy,  Fulfillment, Contentment, all are now yours.

Never looking behind as those minutes are gone, not looking ahead as those minutes cannot yet be redeemed; but rather grasping the hand of El Shaddai and together living this minute, this time, this NOW.

I have decided to alter my practice of making "new year resolutions" and to lay aside goals however worthy they may be.  May I instead be found on my knees, in the presence of my Savior, bending my heart and my will so that He may live fully through me each minute that I am afforded.

Finding the One that has been there all along......