Psalm 119:32
I will run the course of Your commandments, for You shall enlarge my heart.
How have I not understood this before? How was it that I was so blind as to not see?
God has called me. He called you as well you know 😉. I have long known that. I also know that He uses us when we are in motion, not when we are at a stand still. Yet I still questioned. I still sought to understand. I still wanted the answers before I put feet in motion.
From the first of July until now, this 27th day of November, I have been deeply entrenched in an extended lesson of the soul with God as my teacher. When it began it was not of my choosing but it was definitively of His choosing. I had no direction, no vision, and if you had asked me, I would have told you that I had no calling as well.
Through a series of heart rendering torn relationships, job changes, upheaval, and more.... heart lessons were being taught that my hurting soul was quick to grab onto like a drowning person grabs onto a life line. The cries of why, how, where, and when became less and less as I learned to lean so very deeply into God that I, myself, became lost.
For when I am lost, I am found.
Truly. Not waxing poetic or vague but rather discovering the profound truth that has always been there waiting for me to be willing to lose it all.
It began with utter surrender during a worship service on the square in Murfreesboro and the waves began to build. Waves so big that they carried me away from everything safe, from the ones I loved, from security, from confidence. Waves so big that had you asked, I would have told you I was going under for the last time.
Yet here I sit. In utter peace amidst the biggest storm yet, looking in the face of my Father, knowing (that deep knowing that circumstances cannot cause to waver) that I am where I belong for I am held firmly by the One who loves me best and loves me most.
My ears are unstopped and I hear His voice clearly. My heart is wide open for all to see. My eyes are no longer covered by scales. I am home. I am resting in the heart of Father God learning the confidence to be everything that He has called me to - no reservations - no excuses - no apologies.
He has spoken so very clearly this morning. Or maybe I am hearing so clearly for the first time. In losing every last scrap of myself I have fully walked into His family, into the heirship that is fully mine, so that I can fully declare the praises of the One who has called me out of darkness into His marvelous light. 1 Peter 2:9
As I keep His commandments, He enlarges my heart. Right foot forward, my heart expands. Left foot forward, my heart expands. And so it goes. The people I always admired and thought were so "together" in their relationship with God are doing exactly the same. We stumble, we fall, we get covered in filth, and we rise as He lifts us, and we continue on. Right foot forward, heart expanding. Left foot forward, heart expanding.
THIS, this is how the apostles were obedient. THIS is how the heroes of the faith stood their ground. THIS is how faith is able to move mountains. When WE refuse to be moved by outside forces and instead only move at the direction of the Father's will.
I thank you Lord for loving such a wretched person as me. I remain in awe of the mercy and grace that You show to me. I am forever grateful and humbled by Your forgiveness.
Teach me more..... for I am willing to listen to all that You are calling me to. Even despite my not knowing. For I trust you to enlarge my heart.
Boots on the ground. Right foot forward. Left foot forward.
me
Monday, November 27, 2017
Wednesday, November 15, 2017
Offense, Offense she cried
No I am not screaming at football on the television. Not that it couldn't be a very real possibility. We all know I am a good Southern girl who loves her football.
Todays lesson learned..... You know the saying " the best defense is a good offense ?" So do I. But rarely do I think to apply that to my prayer life. Or to my walk with Father God.
My power moment this morning during my studies was just this. Don't just pray against hardship but pray God to bless, provide, and be glorified.
An example would be something along these lines.... Instead of just praying against divorce, ask God to make your marriage a beautiful picture of the gospel of Christ and His love for His bride, and that He will use you to minister to others and advance the kingdom through your loving relationship as husband and wife.
Yes, we do want to bind the evil that would come against us. Yes we do want to claim the blood of Jesus Christ over the situation. Yes, yes, yes.
Romans 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good
Romans 4:17 But God who gives life to the dead, and calls those things which do not exist as though they do.
At the very same time, we want to call God and His promises - provision into the situation by praying lovingly.
My take away is this, do I get caught up in the situation at hand (problem) or do I look around to see the glory that God will receive as He works (solution)?
Let me begin today raising my eyes to the Father who works all things for the good of those that love Him and make praying offensively a part of my daily prayer life.
Praise God there is always hope, peace, joy, and the greatest of them all, LOVE!!!
Hugs folks.....
Todays lesson learned..... You know the saying " the best defense is a good offense ?" So do I. But rarely do I think to apply that to my prayer life. Or to my walk with Father God.
My power moment this morning during my studies was just this. Don't just pray against hardship but pray God to bless, provide, and be glorified.
An example would be something along these lines.... Instead of just praying against divorce, ask God to make your marriage a beautiful picture of the gospel of Christ and His love for His bride, and that He will use you to minister to others and advance the kingdom through your loving relationship as husband and wife.
Yes, we do want to bind the evil that would come against us. Yes we do want to claim the blood of Jesus Christ over the situation. Yes, yes, yes.
Romans 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good
Romans 4:17 But God who gives life to the dead, and calls those things which do not exist as though they do.
At the very same time, we want to call God and His promises - provision into the situation by praying lovingly.
My take away is this, do I get caught up in the situation at hand (problem) or do I look around to see the glory that God will receive as He works (solution)?
Let me begin today raising my eyes to the Father who works all things for the good of those that love Him and make praying offensively a part of my daily prayer life.
Praise God there is always hope, peace, joy, and the greatest of them all, LOVE!!!
Hugs folks.....
Wednesday, November 1, 2017
Undignified &
Just so that we are all on the same page.....
Undignified as defined means: appearing foolish, lacking dignity.
Doesn't sound like anything I would knowingly choose. Quite the opposite in fact. I strive to NOT appear foolish. I find that my biggest fault is that I look to those around me for approval when in fact, the only one whose approval should concern me is that of God.
As I was reading today in 1Samuel 6 a particular verse stood out to me.
1 Samuel 6:22a "And I will be even more undignified than this, and will be humble in my own sight."
I always strive to keep a verse in the context of which is was written so that I do not mis-represent nor give an accounting of a verse that God never intended. Today, the Father used this verse in particular to speak to me to reinforce a new work that He is doing in my life.
God is stripping away any confidence that is based upon self, upon family, upon friends, upon titles; anything that is not of Him. Instead He wishes to replace it with confidence in Him, in who He has created me to be, and in the calling that He desires me to walk in. W H E W... how is that for a heavy load?
It all began a rainy, cold, nasty Saturday. Last Saturday in fact. It all began with 1 Peter 2:9. But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation. His own special people that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.
So as I begin this new path, I thought to share it with you. The highs, the lows, the struggles, and the victories. And though I do not know what all lies ahead, I know this: Philippians 1:6 being confident of this very thing that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.
So back to undignified..... am I willing to appear foolish to others in my worship of, obedience to, glorifying of, exalting of the one true God? Good question and I can honestly say that I am not completely there yet. Not even sure that I am half way there yet. Like many of us, I still look at the perception of others which is most definitely NOT where I should be looking.
Finally, the second part of that verse: and will be humble in my own eyes. Sounds fairly simple but if we take away those protective glasses we wear when we view ourselves, then maybe the answer isn't so obvious as we might think. Did you know it is possible to be completely lacking in self confidence and be proud? Oxymoron I know, but I have discovered that, in my own life, this can indeed be true. There are things that I take pride in. Things such as the way I love others deeply without reservation, the way I serve family, friends, clients community, the way I can grasp new concepts easily and a few other things. So here is the thing... am I proud for the gifts the Lord has given me, of the achievement and how it can bring good things to others, or am I puffing myself up to receive the honor myself? Talk about a wow / hard question. And truth be known sometimes it is the first and often times it is the latter. Not for any other reason than to feel good about self. However, IF we know (that we know that we know) that we are a royal priesthood, sons and daughters of the most high God, then why aren't we already confident in whose we are, whom He created us to be, and the relationship which we walk in with the great God Almighty?
Strong words. Took quite a bit of coffee to get those down I can tell you that much!! So the two words that literally leapt off the page at me were undignified and humble. Not sure that I have ever seen those two words used in conjunction with each other but after many hours of prayer and seeking I can see how together those two words bring about perfect harmony. When we are willing to have our complete and utter focus on God the Father, we take our eyes off of self and off the world and are free to serve/celebrate/worship Him with our whole being no matter how undignified we may appear. With that letting go of all else except God comes a humble heart that has no room for self but only for God.
Pretty cool stuff don'tcha think? I sure did. And although I am still so far from perfecting the practice of this, it is now part of my morning prayer. More of You, less of me. May I be even more undignified than this. May I be humble in my own eyes. My You consume all that I am and more. May I be so lost in You that all else fades away.
Woo!!! I tell you; gets me seriously EXCITED!!!
Time for me to go pull those boots on and get to walkin.... God has much to do today and I am determined to be a willing vessel.
Take care folks........
Undignified as defined means: appearing foolish, lacking dignity.
Doesn't sound like anything I would knowingly choose. Quite the opposite in fact. I strive to NOT appear foolish. I find that my biggest fault is that I look to those around me for approval when in fact, the only one whose approval should concern me is that of God.
As I was reading today in 1Samuel 6 a particular verse stood out to me.
1 Samuel 6:22a "And I will be even more undignified than this, and will be humble in my own sight."
I always strive to keep a verse in the context of which is was written so that I do not mis-represent nor give an accounting of a verse that God never intended. Today, the Father used this verse in particular to speak to me to reinforce a new work that He is doing in my life.
God is stripping away any confidence that is based upon self, upon family, upon friends, upon titles; anything that is not of Him. Instead He wishes to replace it with confidence in Him, in who He has created me to be, and in the calling that He desires me to walk in. W H E W... how is that for a heavy load?
It all began a rainy, cold, nasty Saturday. Last Saturday in fact. It all began with 1 Peter 2:9. But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation. His own special people that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.
So as I begin this new path, I thought to share it with you. The highs, the lows, the struggles, and the victories. And though I do not know what all lies ahead, I know this: Philippians 1:6 being confident of this very thing that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.
So back to undignified..... am I willing to appear foolish to others in my worship of, obedience to, glorifying of, exalting of the one true God? Good question and I can honestly say that I am not completely there yet. Not even sure that I am half way there yet. Like many of us, I still look at the perception of others which is most definitely NOT where I should be looking.
Finally, the second part of that verse: and will be humble in my own eyes. Sounds fairly simple but if we take away those protective glasses we wear when we view ourselves, then maybe the answer isn't so obvious as we might think. Did you know it is possible to be completely lacking in self confidence and be proud? Oxymoron I know, but I have discovered that, in my own life, this can indeed be true. There are things that I take pride in. Things such as the way I love others deeply without reservation, the way I serve family, friends, clients community, the way I can grasp new concepts easily and a few other things. So here is the thing... am I proud for the gifts the Lord has given me, of the achievement and how it can bring good things to others, or am I puffing myself up to receive the honor myself? Talk about a wow / hard question. And truth be known sometimes it is the first and often times it is the latter. Not for any other reason than to feel good about self. However, IF we know (that we know that we know) that we are a royal priesthood, sons and daughters of the most high God, then why aren't we already confident in whose we are, whom He created us to be, and the relationship which we walk in with the great God Almighty?
Strong words. Took quite a bit of coffee to get those down I can tell you that much!! So the two words that literally leapt off the page at me were undignified and humble. Not sure that I have ever seen those two words used in conjunction with each other but after many hours of prayer and seeking I can see how together those two words bring about perfect harmony. When we are willing to have our complete and utter focus on God the Father, we take our eyes off of self and off the world and are free to serve/celebrate/worship Him with our whole being no matter how undignified we may appear. With that letting go of all else except God comes a humble heart that has no room for self but only for God.
Pretty cool stuff don'tcha think? I sure did. And although I am still so far from perfecting the practice of this, it is now part of my morning prayer. More of You, less of me. May I be even more undignified than this. May I be humble in my own eyes. My You consume all that I am and more. May I be so lost in You that all else fades away.
Woo!!! I tell you; gets me seriously EXCITED!!!
Time for me to go pull those boots on and get to walkin.... God has much to do today and I am determined to be a willing vessel.
Take care folks........
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