Micah Taylor wrote a song called Different..... (link below)
Today as I sat in study that song began to play. As the words impacted my very soul, the tears flowed freely and my heart soared with hope and joy!
As I lay down all my flaws and imperfections before the most Holy God, He in turn restores my soul. He is faithful to create the change in me that Micah put in such beautiful words.
I am excited to move forward into His vision of who I am and all that I can be!!!
Coveting your prayers during my journey, I remain faithfully your friend as we walk this road of life.
me.....
Different
Friday, April 12, 2019
Thursday, April 11, 2019
Today, I Choose
Today I Choose.....
What will you choose today? Each moment of this day lies before you a precious gift that you get to open.
What will you choose to do with this gift?
There is a truth that is seldom acknowledged and that is this: life is not happening to you. You are making choices. Even your decision to do nothing is in itself a choice.
So what will you choose today?
Today I choose to make the day before me intentional, God based, faith filled, and obedient so that I might walk into the Father's presence when my days are completed and hear the words, "Well done good and faithful servant."
Today I choose......
Thursday, December 28, 2017
The Battle is Not Yours......
Have you ever been sitting in the stillness of the early hours reading God's Word and find that all of a sudden the words begin to leap off the page? That God begins to speak and to instruct you in such a way as to be a voice shouting in the quiet?
This, this was my experience today. As I sit here ready to share this with you, I am still tingling with awe that the God of the universe would reach out to me, give me instruction in the way to go, guide me in how to walk in this thing we call life, and speak intimately with me in a relationship I can only describe as "all."
You might be wondering what "all" could mean but in it's simplest form that is what it is. It is everything I could ever want or desire from a relationship: love, joy, peace, unity, trust..... And the list just goes on. It is ALL.
I digress.... As I sat here reading 2 Chronicles this morning God used Chapter 20 regarding the reform of Jehoshaphat to speak to me about some things in my life. In this chapter, a great multitude was coming against Jehoshaphat and he knew that he had no power to defeat this enemy.
Listen to the words of Jehoshaphat speak as he calls out to God: "O our God, will You not judge them? For we have no power against this great multitude that is coming against us; nor do we know what to do, but our eyes are upon You."
The FIRST and most important thing they did was to acknowledge God, His power, and the fact that they simply needed to place their eyes upon God. This surely does not mean you do not acknowledge the situation but rather you make the choice to keep your focus on God who is above all as your source. You do not let the things of the world that are pressing in around you take your focus off of the Great I Am...... God Almighty.
Now we see God's reply: "Thus says the Lord to you: Do not be afraid nor dismayed because of this great multitude, for the battle is not yours, but God's."
"You will not need to fight in this battle. Position yourselves, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, who is with you, O Judah and Jerusalem! Do not fear or be dismayed; tomorrow go out agains them, for the Lord is with you."
The SECOND thing we must do is to be willing to hear and listen when God speaks. Following closely on the heels of this is the THIRD which is to be quick to be obedient to what He calls you to do. For some this is not so hard.... for me; well for me this is quite possibly the most difficult. For you see, in each of us is a basic tenant of fight or flight. It is deeply engrained in our dna. For me, the need to fight for those I love, for all that I believe in, for those who are unable to do so is as strong as breathing. So when God speaks as He has this morning; telling me the battle is not mine, it is just plain ol' hard to lay it down. "I" want to do something. I want to stop their pain. I want to make everything better. I, I, I. I find myself heartily sick of the "I" and finally ready to lay it all down for God.
Finally, let's see the results of Jehoshaphat's plea and God's response. God went before him and all the enemy was destroyed before Jehoshaphat ever arrived. The battle cry that was sung by Jehoshaphat and the Levites was this: "Believe in the Lord your God, and you shall be established; believe His prophets, and you shall prosper."
I am learning to sit in "believe in the Lord your God" and allow that to be enough as God goes before me to complete His will in the lives of those around me. A tougher task than you might think but look here at what that can bring about......
"Then the realm of Jehoshaphat was quiet, for his God gave him rest all around!"
Wooooo.... oh man oh man oh man. Can you imagine? Everything was quiet and he was given rest!!! The equation is so simple as to appear unlikely to work but work it does!!!
Acknowledge God
Hear & Listen
Be Obedient = all is quiet and rest is given all around!!!!
Come on people.... you should be shouting along with me right about now!!! The battle is NOT yours.... God has peace and rest for you if we will but leave it in His hands.
One final note, I couldn't help but notice that Jehoshaphat didn't keep complaining about the issue to God, he didn't give the situation un-due notice, instead he committed to go into the situation "bowed before the Lord, worshipping the Lord!"
I am seriously pumped this morning and ready to wake the house with shouts of joy! I may not know the how, the when, nor the anything else but this one thing I rest in. MY GOD IS ABLE.....
Praising Him for each of you that walk through this life with me...
hugs my friends
This, this was my experience today. As I sit here ready to share this with you, I am still tingling with awe that the God of the universe would reach out to me, give me instruction in the way to go, guide me in how to walk in this thing we call life, and speak intimately with me in a relationship I can only describe as "all."
You might be wondering what "all" could mean but in it's simplest form that is what it is. It is everything I could ever want or desire from a relationship: love, joy, peace, unity, trust..... And the list just goes on. It is ALL.
I digress.... As I sat here reading 2 Chronicles this morning God used Chapter 20 regarding the reform of Jehoshaphat to speak to me about some things in my life. In this chapter, a great multitude was coming against Jehoshaphat and he knew that he had no power to defeat this enemy.
Listen to the words of Jehoshaphat speak as he calls out to God: "O our God, will You not judge them? For we have no power against this great multitude that is coming against us; nor do we know what to do, but our eyes are upon You."
The FIRST and most important thing they did was to acknowledge God, His power, and the fact that they simply needed to place their eyes upon God. This surely does not mean you do not acknowledge the situation but rather you make the choice to keep your focus on God who is above all as your source. You do not let the things of the world that are pressing in around you take your focus off of the Great I Am...... God Almighty.
Now we see God's reply: "Thus says the Lord to you: Do not be afraid nor dismayed because of this great multitude, for the battle is not yours, but God's."
"You will not need to fight in this battle. Position yourselves, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, who is with you, O Judah and Jerusalem! Do not fear or be dismayed; tomorrow go out agains them, for the Lord is with you."
The SECOND thing we must do is to be willing to hear and listen when God speaks. Following closely on the heels of this is the THIRD which is to be quick to be obedient to what He calls you to do. For some this is not so hard.... for me; well for me this is quite possibly the most difficult. For you see, in each of us is a basic tenant of fight or flight. It is deeply engrained in our dna. For me, the need to fight for those I love, for all that I believe in, for those who are unable to do so is as strong as breathing. So when God speaks as He has this morning; telling me the battle is not mine, it is just plain ol' hard to lay it down. "I" want to do something. I want to stop their pain. I want to make everything better. I, I, I. I find myself heartily sick of the "I" and finally ready to lay it all down for God.
Finally, let's see the results of Jehoshaphat's plea and God's response. God went before him and all the enemy was destroyed before Jehoshaphat ever arrived. The battle cry that was sung by Jehoshaphat and the Levites was this: "Believe in the Lord your God, and you shall be established; believe His prophets, and you shall prosper."
I am learning to sit in "believe in the Lord your God" and allow that to be enough as God goes before me to complete His will in the lives of those around me. A tougher task than you might think but look here at what that can bring about......
"Then the realm of Jehoshaphat was quiet, for his God gave him rest all around!"
Wooooo.... oh man oh man oh man. Can you imagine? Everything was quiet and he was given rest!!! The equation is so simple as to appear unlikely to work but work it does!!!
Acknowledge God
Hear & Listen
Be Obedient = all is quiet and rest is given all around!!!!
Come on people.... you should be shouting along with me right about now!!! The battle is NOT yours.... God has peace and rest for you if we will but leave it in His hands.
One final note, I couldn't help but notice that Jehoshaphat didn't keep complaining about the issue to God, he didn't give the situation un-due notice, instead he committed to go into the situation "bowed before the Lord, worshipping the Lord!"
I am seriously pumped this morning and ready to wake the house with shouts of joy! I may not know the how, the when, nor the anything else but this one thing I rest in. MY GOD IS ABLE.....
Praising Him for each of you that walk through this life with me...
hugs my friends
Monday, November 27, 2017
Right Foot Forward
Psalm 119:32
I will run the course of Your commandments, for You shall enlarge my heart.
How have I not understood this before? How was it that I was so blind as to not see?
God has called me. He called you as well you know 😉. I have long known that. I also know that He uses us when we are in motion, not when we are at a stand still. Yet I still questioned. I still sought to understand. I still wanted the answers before I put feet in motion.
From the first of July until now, this 27th day of November, I have been deeply entrenched in an extended lesson of the soul with God as my teacher. When it began it was not of my choosing but it was definitively of His choosing. I had no direction, no vision, and if you had asked me, I would have told you that I had no calling as well.
Through a series of heart rendering torn relationships, job changes, upheaval, and more.... heart lessons were being taught that my hurting soul was quick to grab onto like a drowning person grabs onto a life line. The cries of why, how, where, and when became less and less as I learned to lean so very deeply into God that I, myself, became lost.
For when I am lost, I am found.
Truly. Not waxing poetic or vague but rather discovering the profound truth that has always been there waiting for me to be willing to lose it all.
It began with utter surrender during a worship service on the square in Murfreesboro and the waves began to build. Waves so big that they carried me away from everything safe, from the ones I loved, from security, from confidence. Waves so big that had you asked, I would have told you I was going under for the last time.
Yet here I sit. In utter peace amidst the biggest storm yet, looking in the face of my Father, knowing (that deep knowing that circumstances cannot cause to waver) that I am where I belong for I am held firmly by the One who loves me best and loves me most.
My ears are unstopped and I hear His voice clearly. My heart is wide open for all to see. My eyes are no longer covered by scales. I am home. I am resting in the heart of Father God learning the confidence to be everything that He has called me to - no reservations - no excuses - no apologies.
He has spoken so very clearly this morning. Or maybe I am hearing so clearly for the first time. In losing every last scrap of myself I have fully walked into His family, into the heirship that is fully mine, so that I can fully declare the praises of the One who has called me out of darkness into His marvelous light. 1 Peter 2:9
As I keep His commandments, He enlarges my heart. Right foot forward, my heart expands. Left foot forward, my heart expands. And so it goes. The people I always admired and thought were so "together" in their relationship with God are doing exactly the same. We stumble, we fall, we get covered in filth, and we rise as He lifts us, and we continue on. Right foot forward, heart expanding. Left foot forward, heart expanding.
THIS, this is how the apostles were obedient. THIS is how the heroes of the faith stood their ground. THIS is how faith is able to move mountains. When WE refuse to be moved by outside forces and instead only move at the direction of the Father's will.
I thank you Lord for loving such a wretched person as me. I remain in awe of the mercy and grace that You show to me. I am forever grateful and humbled by Your forgiveness.
Teach me more..... for I am willing to listen to all that You are calling me to. Even despite my not knowing. For I trust you to enlarge my heart.
Boots on the ground. Right foot forward. Left foot forward.
me
I will run the course of Your commandments, for You shall enlarge my heart.
How have I not understood this before? How was it that I was so blind as to not see?
God has called me. He called you as well you know 😉. I have long known that. I also know that He uses us when we are in motion, not when we are at a stand still. Yet I still questioned. I still sought to understand. I still wanted the answers before I put feet in motion.
From the first of July until now, this 27th day of November, I have been deeply entrenched in an extended lesson of the soul with God as my teacher. When it began it was not of my choosing but it was definitively of His choosing. I had no direction, no vision, and if you had asked me, I would have told you that I had no calling as well.
Through a series of heart rendering torn relationships, job changes, upheaval, and more.... heart lessons were being taught that my hurting soul was quick to grab onto like a drowning person grabs onto a life line. The cries of why, how, where, and when became less and less as I learned to lean so very deeply into God that I, myself, became lost.
For when I am lost, I am found.
Truly. Not waxing poetic or vague but rather discovering the profound truth that has always been there waiting for me to be willing to lose it all.
It began with utter surrender during a worship service on the square in Murfreesboro and the waves began to build. Waves so big that they carried me away from everything safe, from the ones I loved, from security, from confidence. Waves so big that had you asked, I would have told you I was going under for the last time.
Yet here I sit. In utter peace amidst the biggest storm yet, looking in the face of my Father, knowing (that deep knowing that circumstances cannot cause to waver) that I am where I belong for I am held firmly by the One who loves me best and loves me most.
My ears are unstopped and I hear His voice clearly. My heart is wide open for all to see. My eyes are no longer covered by scales. I am home. I am resting in the heart of Father God learning the confidence to be everything that He has called me to - no reservations - no excuses - no apologies.
He has spoken so very clearly this morning. Or maybe I am hearing so clearly for the first time. In losing every last scrap of myself I have fully walked into His family, into the heirship that is fully mine, so that I can fully declare the praises of the One who has called me out of darkness into His marvelous light. 1 Peter 2:9
As I keep His commandments, He enlarges my heart. Right foot forward, my heart expands. Left foot forward, my heart expands. And so it goes. The people I always admired and thought were so "together" in their relationship with God are doing exactly the same. We stumble, we fall, we get covered in filth, and we rise as He lifts us, and we continue on. Right foot forward, heart expanding. Left foot forward, heart expanding.
THIS, this is how the apostles were obedient. THIS is how the heroes of the faith stood their ground. THIS is how faith is able to move mountains. When WE refuse to be moved by outside forces and instead only move at the direction of the Father's will.
I thank you Lord for loving such a wretched person as me. I remain in awe of the mercy and grace that You show to me. I am forever grateful and humbled by Your forgiveness.
Teach me more..... for I am willing to listen to all that You are calling me to. Even despite my not knowing. For I trust you to enlarge my heart.
Boots on the ground. Right foot forward. Left foot forward.
me
Wednesday, November 15, 2017
Offense, Offense she cried
No I am not screaming at football on the television. Not that it couldn't be a very real possibility. We all know I am a good Southern girl who loves her football.
Todays lesson learned..... You know the saying " the best defense is a good offense ?" So do I. But rarely do I think to apply that to my prayer life. Or to my walk with Father God.
My power moment this morning during my studies was just this. Don't just pray against hardship but pray God to bless, provide, and be glorified.
An example would be something along these lines.... Instead of just praying against divorce, ask God to make your marriage a beautiful picture of the gospel of Christ and His love for His bride, and that He will use you to minister to others and advance the kingdom through your loving relationship as husband and wife.
Yes, we do want to bind the evil that would come against us. Yes we do want to claim the blood of Jesus Christ over the situation. Yes, yes, yes.
Romans 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good
Romans 4:17 But God who gives life to the dead, and calls those things which do not exist as though they do.
At the very same time, we want to call God and His promises - provision into the situation by praying lovingly.
My take away is this, do I get caught up in the situation at hand (problem) or do I look around to see the glory that God will receive as He works (solution)?
Let me begin today raising my eyes to the Father who works all things for the good of those that love Him and make praying offensively a part of my daily prayer life.
Praise God there is always hope, peace, joy, and the greatest of them all, LOVE!!!
Hugs folks.....
Todays lesson learned..... You know the saying " the best defense is a good offense ?" So do I. But rarely do I think to apply that to my prayer life. Or to my walk with Father God.
My power moment this morning during my studies was just this. Don't just pray against hardship but pray God to bless, provide, and be glorified.
An example would be something along these lines.... Instead of just praying against divorce, ask God to make your marriage a beautiful picture of the gospel of Christ and His love for His bride, and that He will use you to minister to others and advance the kingdom through your loving relationship as husband and wife.
Yes, we do want to bind the evil that would come against us. Yes we do want to claim the blood of Jesus Christ over the situation. Yes, yes, yes.
Romans 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good
Romans 4:17 But God who gives life to the dead, and calls those things which do not exist as though they do.
At the very same time, we want to call God and His promises - provision into the situation by praying lovingly.
My take away is this, do I get caught up in the situation at hand (problem) or do I look around to see the glory that God will receive as He works (solution)?
Let me begin today raising my eyes to the Father who works all things for the good of those that love Him and make praying offensively a part of my daily prayer life.
Praise God there is always hope, peace, joy, and the greatest of them all, LOVE!!!
Hugs folks.....
Wednesday, November 1, 2017
Undignified &
Just so that we are all on the same page.....
Undignified as defined means: appearing foolish, lacking dignity.
Doesn't sound like anything I would knowingly choose. Quite the opposite in fact. I strive to NOT appear foolish. I find that my biggest fault is that I look to those around me for approval when in fact, the only one whose approval should concern me is that of God.
As I was reading today in 1Samuel 6 a particular verse stood out to me.
1 Samuel 6:22a "And I will be even more undignified than this, and will be humble in my own sight."
I always strive to keep a verse in the context of which is was written so that I do not mis-represent nor give an accounting of a verse that God never intended. Today, the Father used this verse in particular to speak to me to reinforce a new work that He is doing in my life.
God is stripping away any confidence that is based upon self, upon family, upon friends, upon titles; anything that is not of Him. Instead He wishes to replace it with confidence in Him, in who He has created me to be, and in the calling that He desires me to walk in. W H E W... how is that for a heavy load?
It all began a rainy, cold, nasty Saturday. Last Saturday in fact. It all began with 1 Peter 2:9. But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation. His own special people that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.
So as I begin this new path, I thought to share it with you. The highs, the lows, the struggles, and the victories. And though I do not know what all lies ahead, I know this: Philippians 1:6 being confident of this very thing that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.
So back to undignified..... am I willing to appear foolish to others in my worship of, obedience to, glorifying of, exalting of the one true God? Good question and I can honestly say that I am not completely there yet. Not even sure that I am half way there yet. Like many of us, I still look at the perception of others which is most definitely NOT where I should be looking.
Finally, the second part of that verse: and will be humble in my own eyes. Sounds fairly simple but if we take away those protective glasses we wear when we view ourselves, then maybe the answer isn't so obvious as we might think. Did you know it is possible to be completely lacking in self confidence and be proud? Oxymoron I know, but I have discovered that, in my own life, this can indeed be true. There are things that I take pride in. Things such as the way I love others deeply without reservation, the way I serve family, friends, clients community, the way I can grasp new concepts easily and a few other things. So here is the thing... am I proud for the gifts the Lord has given me, of the achievement and how it can bring good things to others, or am I puffing myself up to receive the honor myself? Talk about a wow / hard question. And truth be known sometimes it is the first and often times it is the latter. Not for any other reason than to feel good about self. However, IF we know (that we know that we know) that we are a royal priesthood, sons and daughters of the most high God, then why aren't we already confident in whose we are, whom He created us to be, and the relationship which we walk in with the great God Almighty?
Strong words. Took quite a bit of coffee to get those down I can tell you that much!! So the two words that literally leapt off the page at me were undignified and humble. Not sure that I have ever seen those two words used in conjunction with each other but after many hours of prayer and seeking I can see how together those two words bring about perfect harmony. When we are willing to have our complete and utter focus on God the Father, we take our eyes off of self and off the world and are free to serve/celebrate/worship Him with our whole being no matter how undignified we may appear. With that letting go of all else except God comes a humble heart that has no room for self but only for God.
Pretty cool stuff don'tcha think? I sure did. And although I am still so far from perfecting the practice of this, it is now part of my morning prayer. More of You, less of me. May I be even more undignified than this. May I be humble in my own eyes. My You consume all that I am and more. May I be so lost in You that all else fades away.
Woo!!! I tell you; gets me seriously EXCITED!!!
Time for me to go pull those boots on and get to walkin.... God has much to do today and I am determined to be a willing vessel.
Take care folks........
Undignified as defined means: appearing foolish, lacking dignity.
Doesn't sound like anything I would knowingly choose. Quite the opposite in fact. I strive to NOT appear foolish. I find that my biggest fault is that I look to those around me for approval when in fact, the only one whose approval should concern me is that of God.
As I was reading today in 1Samuel 6 a particular verse stood out to me.
1 Samuel 6:22a "And I will be even more undignified than this, and will be humble in my own sight."
I always strive to keep a verse in the context of which is was written so that I do not mis-represent nor give an accounting of a verse that God never intended. Today, the Father used this verse in particular to speak to me to reinforce a new work that He is doing in my life.
God is stripping away any confidence that is based upon self, upon family, upon friends, upon titles; anything that is not of Him. Instead He wishes to replace it with confidence in Him, in who He has created me to be, and in the calling that He desires me to walk in. W H E W... how is that for a heavy load?
It all began a rainy, cold, nasty Saturday. Last Saturday in fact. It all began with 1 Peter 2:9. But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation. His own special people that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.
So as I begin this new path, I thought to share it with you. The highs, the lows, the struggles, and the victories. And though I do not know what all lies ahead, I know this: Philippians 1:6 being confident of this very thing that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.
So back to undignified..... am I willing to appear foolish to others in my worship of, obedience to, glorifying of, exalting of the one true God? Good question and I can honestly say that I am not completely there yet. Not even sure that I am half way there yet. Like many of us, I still look at the perception of others which is most definitely NOT where I should be looking.
Finally, the second part of that verse: and will be humble in my own eyes. Sounds fairly simple but if we take away those protective glasses we wear when we view ourselves, then maybe the answer isn't so obvious as we might think. Did you know it is possible to be completely lacking in self confidence and be proud? Oxymoron I know, but I have discovered that, in my own life, this can indeed be true. There are things that I take pride in. Things such as the way I love others deeply without reservation, the way I serve family, friends, clients community, the way I can grasp new concepts easily and a few other things. So here is the thing... am I proud for the gifts the Lord has given me, of the achievement and how it can bring good things to others, or am I puffing myself up to receive the honor myself? Talk about a wow / hard question. And truth be known sometimes it is the first and often times it is the latter. Not for any other reason than to feel good about self. However, IF we know (that we know that we know) that we are a royal priesthood, sons and daughters of the most high God, then why aren't we already confident in whose we are, whom He created us to be, and the relationship which we walk in with the great God Almighty?
Strong words. Took quite a bit of coffee to get those down I can tell you that much!! So the two words that literally leapt off the page at me were undignified and humble. Not sure that I have ever seen those two words used in conjunction with each other but after many hours of prayer and seeking I can see how together those two words bring about perfect harmony. When we are willing to have our complete and utter focus on God the Father, we take our eyes off of self and off the world and are free to serve/celebrate/worship Him with our whole being no matter how undignified we may appear. With that letting go of all else except God comes a humble heart that has no room for self but only for God.
Pretty cool stuff don'tcha think? I sure did. And although I am still so far from perfecting the practice of this, it is now part of my morning prayer. More of You, less of me. May I be even more undignified than this. May I be humble in my own eyes. My You consume all that I am and more. May I be so lost in You that all else fades away.
Woo!!! I tell you; gets me seriously EXCITED!!!
Time for me to go pull those boots on and get to walkin.... God has much to do today and I am determined to be a willing vessel.
Take care folks........
Thursday, October 26, 2017
Love ~ Is it worth it?
Have you ever been just going along about your day, humming a tune, and then out of no where something is said or done which just completely knocks you off balance?
Something so unexpected that although you are hearing it - experiencing it, you just can't get your mind to comprehend what is happening? Amidst your mind struggling to comprehend the why and how of the situation your heart is working over time to stop the bleeding from the wound that was inflicted; there is no real way to think, to process it, or to react due to the numbness that creeps over you as you are reeling.
Recently this was me. Experiencing and hearing a hurt that my mind just couldn't seem to wrap itself around. Something so outside of my thinking - expectations that I couldn't get my mind to comprehend what was happening. In an attempt to gain some perspective and begin to make sense of it all, I reached out to an individual who is filled with wisdom and grounded in the Word of God. The response I received was so not what I expected or could have imagined.
"I know I have said this many times to you (now anyone with a lick of common sense knows that isn't the prelude to a warm and fuzzy so much as a 'you aren't listening to me when I speak' moment) 'protect your heart'. You love big and it opens you to big hurts."
True to the strong willed character that I am, I immediately fired back with "may those words be on my tombstone 'she loved big' no matter the hurt it brings, may it always ring true in my life."
It has been several sunrises since that conversation and it is something that I am seeking God earnestly on. One question that keeps popping up is this; did I really mean that? Did I really, from the depths of my being mean that? Because if so, then that means that I am choosing to allow hurt from unexpected sources into my life. That means, that when that hurt comes, I MUST, become an expert at crawling up in the lap of the Father and allowing Him to heal me rather than allowing that hurt to have it's way with my heart, my soul, and my character. That rather than the return fire option, I MUST choose to let go of all that rages through me.
So then the question becomes; is it worth it? That is not something that could be answered with a snap response but instead requires deep introspection, deep guidance from the Father, and an even deeper commitment to daily roll my hurts onto Him.
So this morning (yes it has taken a while), I go back to my original response with a new conviction and a firm faith and trust in my God and Savior and I say with all the strength that I have.......
MAY LOVE ALWAYS RING TRUE IN MY LIFE.
Now before there is any commenting, applauding, or any edification of me at all.... know that my nature is at war with those words and this stand that I am taking. There is no halo above my head. In fact, quite the opposite 😈. But my heart is true and my God is faithful and will sustain me.
So I ask that you hold me accountable to what you have read here (please be kind when you do so 😊) and that you join me in this commitment to love. Doing so in the full knowledge that it is not easy, it is not always appreciated, it is not always well received, but also knowing that God is faithful to provide the strength to do that which He leads us to do.
In light of what is coming up this weekend in our beautiful city, this becomes even more heavy on my heart. Let us each seek God's will rather than our own reactions and choose to love through the hate.
Much love my friends..... Pull on those boots and let's get busy walking.
Something so unexpected that although you are hearing it - experiencing it, you just can't get your mind to comprehend what is happening? Amidst your mind struggling to comprehend the why and how of the situation your heart is working over time to stop the bleeding from the wound that was inflicted; there is no real way to think, to process it, or to react due to the numbness that creeps over you as you are reeling.
Recently this was me. Experiencing and hearing a hurt that my mind just couldn't seem to wrap itself around. Something so outside of my thinking - expectations that I couldn't get my mind to comprehend what was happening. In an attempt to gain some perspective and begin to make sense of it all, I reached out to an individual who is filled with wisdom and grounded in the Word of God. The response I received was so not what I expected or could have imagined.
"I know I have said this many times to you (now anyone with a lick of common sense knows that isn't the prelude to a warm and fuzzy so much as a 'you aren't listening to me when I speak' moment) 'protect your heart'. You love big and it opens you to big hurts."
True to the strong willed character that I am, I immediately fired back with "may those words be on my tombstone 'she loved big' no matter the hurt it brings, may it always ring true in my life."
It has been several sunrises since that conversation and it is something that I am seeking God earnestly on. One question that keeps popping up is this; did I really mean that? Did I really, from the depths of my being mean that? Because if so, then that means that I am choosing to allow hurt from unexpected sources into my life. That means, that when that hurt comes, I MUST, become an expert at crawling up in the lap of the Father and allowing Him to heal me rather than allowing that hurt to have it's way with my heart, my soul, and my character. That rather than the return fire option, I MUST choose to let go of all that rages through me.
So then the question becomes; is it worth it? That is not something that could be answered with a snap response but instead requires deep introspection, deep guidance from the Father, and an even deeper commitment to daily roll my hurts onto Him.
So this morning (yes it has taken a while), I go back to my original response with a new conviction and a firm faith and trust in my God and Savior and I say with all the strength that I have.......
MAY LOVE ALWAYS RING TRUE IN MY LIFE.
Now before there is any commenting, applauding, or any edification of me at all.... know that my nature is at war with those words and this stand that I am taking. There is no halo above my head. In fact, quite the opposite 😈. But my heart is true and my God is faithful and will sustain me.
So I ask that you hold me accountable to what you have read here (please be kind when you do so 😊) and that you join me in this commitment to love. Doing so in the full knowledge that it is not easy, it is not always appreciated, it is not always well received, but also knowing that God is faithful to provide the strength to do that which He leads us to do.
In light of what is coming up this weekend in our beautiful city, this becomes even more heavy on my heart. Let us each seek God's will rather than our own reactions and choose to love through the hate.
Much love my friends..... Pull on those boots and let's get busy walking.
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